Love Episodes - Episode 12: With or Without?

[yoru-no-hikaru.livejournal.com]

Pairing: KinKi Kids
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Don't own KinKi Kids, or anything JE-related
Warnings: graphic sex scenes, tiniest bit of initial sadness
Multi-Chapter


Introduction: Okay, this takes place sometime during 04. The guys are still living together and facing daily routine problems. It's quite hard, living together. So, Tsuyoshi asks Koichi to move out again. How will Koichi react to that?


Notes: It's been way too long since I've updated. Gomen ne. ^_^"  I hope you're gonna like this one. I had a lot of fun writing it. I love how they can tease and play and yet enjoy each other. The sex issue is something that is present about every day. I wanted to show that in certain situations you will just act impulsively. You can't always be considerate about  sex, that's totally absurd. So, yet again, a bit of reality in an "ordinary" sex life. ^_^

“Koichi,” Tsuyoshi sighed exasperatedly. “Will you please stop crying? I told you, this is not breaking up, just…”

He sighed again, then bit his lip as he looked at his lover who sat on the couch and simply wouldn’t calm down, tears running down his face as he heaved out his grief.

“Koichi,” the younger boy tried again. “Will you please look at me?” He shook the other gently, but was shoved away. “Koichi, I love you.”

“You have a very odd way of showing that,” Koichi finally rasped out, glaring daggers at him. “First you go to Johnny to ask him to go solo and then you throw me out.”

 

“I’m not…” Tsuyoshi broke off, breathing in deeply as he tried to stay calm. “First off, what I gave Johnny was kind of an outline. Something that I wanted to develop into a solo project, yes. But I never would have thought he would agree to it right away and as it is. I just randomly gave it to him. I wanted to talk to you about it.”

“And even though I had never heard of it before, I agreed to it,” Koichi sobbed. “But now you’re telling me to leave the house.”

 

“I know,” Tsuyoshi sighed out. “I’ve been thinking about how to go about this for weeks. At first I even thought I’d just try to stand it as it is, but…”

“But you can’t stand me here?” Koichi asked in disbelief.

“That’s not it at all,” Tsuyoshi insisted. “It was nice to have you here for a while.”

“Yeah, when you felt lonely you kept me here and now you want to get rid of me,” Koichi spat at him.

 

“Koichi,” Tsuyoshi demanded, getting angry, “I really thought you’d know me better than that by now. I love you. Truly love you. And I want to keep it that way. I mean, goodness, it’s not the end of the world, we’re just gonna have two apartments. We had that before and it worked quite fine. It’s just that if we keep fighting over these little immaterial things, we’ll end up being annoyed with each other and I just don’t want that to happen.”

Koichi blinked at him.

 

Tsuyoshi rolled his eyes. “Don’t tell me you haven’t felt it. We fight over the TV’s remote control, who gets to be on the net, who will walk the dog, when we get up or go to bed, whether the bath water should be hot or moderate, and the list goes on and on. We simply cannot live together. Or maybe it’s that we can’t yet. Maybe we’re still too young for that. My point is, I don’t want to lose you because you drive me crazy in here. I love being with you when we spend time together, but when I want time to myself your constant presence is kind of… well, bugging, I can’t help it.”

 

“Are you sure you love me?” Koichi asked, voice sounding husky from crying.

“I’m very sure,” Tsuyoshi told him. “If I didn’t love you so, I’d just let things roll and see what happens. But I have a bad feeling about this and I want to protect our relationship and that is why I’m suggesting this.”

Koichi chuckled a bit, rubbing his eyes. “I never really thought of you as the voice of reason.”

“Well,” Tsuyoshi mused, “you’re too clingy to be reasonable about this and one of us has to be, so…”

 

“I’m not clingy,” Koichi told him, pouting.

“Yes, you are,” the younger boy told him in a matter-of-fact voice. “That’s because you never meet other people. And while you’re here with me, you see even less reason to go out with others. That’s another reason why we should live separately.”

“I don’t really like meeting other people much,” Koichi mumbled.

“I know,” Tsuyoshi smiled. “But if you keep following me around, I’ll get a `stalker´ feeling,” he teased.

 

Koichi stuck out his tongue to him.

“Plus, what if I want to meet other people?” Tsuyoshi asked casually.

Koichi made a face. “You make it sound like you only want me for sex.”

“Stop being ridiculous,” Tsuyoshi told him. “You know that’s not true. We can always meet for anything you want to do. It’s also not a problem to stay over night when we have sex. But… do you really think this is such a bad idea?”

“Well, I don’t like it,” Koichi admitted. “But that’s mainly because I dislike living on my own in the first place.”

 

“Yeah, you won’t have anyone to cook for you or prepare your bath,” Tsuyoshi smirked.

“Dumbass,” Koichi muttered out.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to be mean,” Tsuyoshi said softly, finally daring to sit down next to his lover. “But really, don’t you think it would be nice to have… more space?”

Koichi blinked, considering that for a while. “Well, sometimes you really do annoy me a lot.”

“See?” Tsuyoshi urged. “And I promise you, it won’t get better.”

 

Koichi nodded thoughtfully. Then he sighed. “Maybe you’re right. It might be better for me to move out. I still don’t like it,” he added, still sounding sad.

“I know,” Tsuyoshi answered in a soothing voice, pulling the older boy into a warm hug, kissing his temple repeatedly.

As Koichi snuggled up against him he smiled mirthfully, running his hands up and down his partner’s back.

 

“I love you,” he whispered into Koichi’s ear and as the older boy looked up at that he captured his lips in a chaste kiss.

Koichi did not resist in the slightest, kissing the other back lovingly. They smiled at each other as they pulled back.

“So, fight is over?” Tsuyoshi asked warily.

Koichi nodded. “Fight over.”

 

“That was our first real fight, wasn’t it?” Tsuyoshi mused. “I mean, like, big fight.”

Koichi thought on that for a moment and then nodded again. “I think so.”

“Why,” Tsuyoshi mused, “I think we did alright.”

The older boy smiled at him as he kissed his lips again lightly. “I think we did fantastic. Not a single piece of crockery got smashed.”

Tsuyoshi chuckled at that. “Idiot,” he teased affectionately, stroking the other’s hair. “You know, this might actually give us new opportunities in our love life.”

 

“Like how?” Koichi wanted to know.

“Well,” Tsuyoshi grinned at him, “like I could come to your place unannounced with nothing but a rain coat on.”

“You wouldn’t,” Koichi stated, gaping at his partner.

“Would you like it if I did?” Tsuyoshi teased.

“Maybe…” Koichi mumbled, blushing at the idea.

 

Tsuyoshi smiled suggestively at him, crawling closer. “I could wear a rain coat now too, you know.”

The older boy blinked at him. “What for?”

Tsuyoshi blinked back. “Well, I…” He grinned sheepishly. “I kinda tried to initiate some sex talk, but apparently I failed.”

“Sex talk?” Koichi asked. “About rain coats?”

“About being naked under a rain coat,” Tsuyoshi explained.

“But since we’re both already here, why don’t you just get naked without the rain coat?”

 

Tsuyoshi sighed in defeat. “Okay, you just killed it.”

“Killed what?” Koichi asked, confused.

“The mood,” Tsuyoshi said irritably.

“So,” Koichi mused, “that means now you won’t get naked.”

“Not quite likely,” the younger boy mumbled back, already making to get up.

Koichi held him back, though, grabbing his sleeve.

 

“Then,” Koichi continued in an analytical voice as he pulled his lover close enough to sneak both hands under his shirt, “I’ll have to undress you myself?”

Tsuyoshi first blinked at him, then huffed a bit, finishing in a cute pout. “Who said you could?”

“Aw,” Koichi crooned suggestively, rubbing his hands against the other’s back lightly. “Come now. You want me and you know it.”

“My, aren’t you full of yourself?” Tsuyoshi teased, acting indifferent.

 

“Ah,” Koichi made, nodding knowingly. “Of course, how could I forget? You like me needy.”

The next second Tsuyoshi found Koichi’s body pressed against his as the older boy rubbed against him suggestively. Koichi’s lips moved to Tsuyoshi’s ear, nipping ever so lightly, before parting to verbally seduce his lover.

“Mh, Tsuyoshi,” the older boy hummed. “I want you.”

 

He grinned inwardly as he felt a shiver running down his lover’s back and heard him gasp slightly, but he forced himself to stay in character. “Please, Tsuyoshi,” he continued in a pleading voice, moving his hands on the other’s back again, “sleep with me.”

Tsuyoshi remained totally motionless in his arms for another few seconds. Then his hands flew to Koichi’s shirt, practically trying to rip it off in one go, pressing his body back against the other’s.

“Ah, yeah,” Koichi sighed happily as he felt a hot tongue against his neck.

 

As Koichi grabbed for the other’s shirt this time, he met no resistance and the item was removed swiftly. While his own shirt followed he already started to unfasten the other’s pants. Clothes were removed entirely within a minute. Both naked, they grinned at each other. Tsuyoshi urged Koichi to lie down on his back on the couch, already crawling on top of him.

“You’re such a demanding top,” Koichi teased playfully. “With your strong M personality, one would think that you’re the submissive type. But you really love having sex and being in charge.”

 

“You like it, though,” Tsuyoshi retorted daringly. “You like receiving pleasure just as I like giving it to you.”

“True,” Koichi smirked. Then his gaze went to the bedroom. “Ano… will you go, get a rubber? Or should we move?”

“I like it here,” Tsuyoshi told him playfully. “Plus, our bedroom package is out.”

“Eh?” Koichi blinked. “Already?”

“Well,” Tsuyoshi winked at him. “We had some catching up to do.”

 

“Bathroom, then?” Koichi suggested.

“Nah, we took that to the Jimusho,” Tsuyoshi reminded him.

“Right,” Koichi nodded. “Then?”

Suddenly Tsuyoshi was gone and Koichi bemourned the loss of contact. Only briefly, though. Then, he grinned at his lover as he pulled a condom out of his wallet.

“I always keep a spare,” he announced proudly.

“Good man,” Koichi praised him.

 

“I’ll just get lube,” the younger man suggested.

Koichi nodded, relaxing into the sofa, watching his lover roam the apartment in his naked state. He smiled to himself. When Tsuyoshi returned he looked a bit awkward.

“What, lube out too?” Koichi blinked. “It’s okay, you can just lick me and…”

“Lube’s okay,” Tsuyoshi mumbled out.

“Then what?” Koichi asked.

 

“I… dropped it,” the younger boy said apologetically.

Koichi just blinked at him.

“The condom,” he explained. “And…” He sighed. “Well, as it is, we can’t use it.”

Koichi bit his lip.

“I’m sorry,” Tsuyoshi muttered, sounding guilty.

“Fuck it,” Koichi suddenly said, looking at his partner determinedly.

“What?” Tsuyoshi blinked.

 

“Just fuck it for this one time,” the older boy urged.

“What, you mean…” Tsuyoshi licked his lips nervously. “Bare?”

“It won’t kill us if we do it just this once,” Koichi decided.

“Who’s to say that?” the younger boy tried to reason.

“Come on,” Koichi whined. “It’s not like we regularly do this, or fuck around. And we’re both healthy.”

 

“Everybody’s healthy at first,” Tsuyoshi told him.

“Just for this one time it should be fine,” Koichi insisted, pulling the other close again. “Tomorrow we’ll buy a new package and that’s that.”

Tsuyoshi resisted for a moment, feeling unsure about the idea, but Koichi’s hands on him were warm and soft and stroking him in all the right places, already hazing him in lust again so that his brain would shut off anyway.

“Just tonight,” he insisted, shifting back onto the other.

Koichi nodded eagerly, pulling him down for more contact. “Fuck, I really want you,” he breathed out.

 

He was hardly able to finish the sentence before hot lips closed over his, kissing him passionately. He mewled happily, arching his back to show his lover that he liked it. However, as the mouth moved to his neck, he pulled back a bit.

“Can we please skip this part?” he asked breathlessly. “I’m already so hot that it drives me up the wall.”

 

“What do you want, then?” Tsuyoshi asked in a husky voice, pushing his hips into Koichi’s hand that had grabbed his erection to stroke it intensely.

“You like when I voice,” Koichi said playfully. “Make me moan. Stroke me inside.”

“Happily,” the younger boy smiled at him, grabbing the lube from the floor and applying it on his lover’s back and his own fingers.

He circled the hole a bit, loosening it a little, then pushed two fingers in right away.

“Okay?” he asked his lover.

 

Koichi nodded at him, eyes closed and a look of deep concentration of his face. He shook his head. Tsuyoshi changed his angle as he kept moving his fingers in and out.

“Deeper,” Koichi instructed, shifting a bit.

The younger boy bit his lip as he followed the request. “Better?”

“And crook your fingers?” Koichi asked, sounding desperate.

Another shift.

 

“Okay, you’re getting there,” Koichi told him. “Just a bit…”

Tsuyoshi kept feeling inside the other, trying to hit his prostate. Then he felt a slightly softer pressure against his fingertips.

“There?”

“Yeah,” Koichi gasped out, hips rocking forward involuntarily.

“Okay.”

 

Tsuyoshi kept pushing against the spot again and again, making Koichi moan in pleasure. The older boy was trashing on the couch, flinging his arms wildly. The sight was immensely arousing and Tsuyoshi stroked his cock while he pleasured his lover with his fingers.

“Hold on,” Koichi panted out after a while.

“What?” Tsuyoshi asked, fingers still inside his lover.

“Can you rub it a bit more?” Koichi requested, smiling. “Like, you know, not leaving it and then pushing again, but keeping your fingers on it and apply pressure?”

 

“I’ll try,” the younger boy offered and went to work again immediately.

He wiggled his fingers wildly, making Koichi gasp in surprise.

“Oh god,” the older boy breathed out. “Oh, Tsuyoshi… harder, please.”

He bucked up wildly, wanting more pressure.

“Harder, come on,” he demanded again.

 

Tsuyoshi tried hard to keep up with his lover’s demands, but they were hard to meet.

“My fingers are going numb,” he tried, but Koichi didn’t even hear him anymore, body already shivering with pleasure.

“More,” Koichi gasped, his voice a bit higher than usual and the vocals made Tsuyoshi go wild with desire.

“I want you,” he breathed into the other’s ear and Koichi nodded, trying to catch his breath.

“Okay,” the older boy agreed, licking his lips in pleasure. “But hurry.”

 

Tsuyoshi looked at his wanton partner, a last shred of doubt in his mind. “Are you sure about this?”

“Get on with it,” Koichi whined. “Please, I want it.”

“Okay,” Tsuyoshi nodded, lathering up his cock well before he positioned himself between his lover’s willingly spread legs.

The younger boy pushed the other up in a practised manner, placing his dick at the other’s entrance.

 

“Come on, I’m ready,” Koichi urged him once more.

“Okay,” Tsuyoshi breathed out, pushing in carefully.

Koichi sighed. “I can feel you,” he mumbled in wonder, wiggling his hips playfully. “Nice.”

Tsuyoshi smiled as he started to rock back and forth gently. Feeling the other’s body around him he noticed how aroused he was already.

“How do you get me so hot?” he mused in wonder.

“Want to come already?” Koichi asked playfully.

“Nh,” Tsuyoshi made, shaking his had.

“Fine with me,” the older boy told him. “I told you, I’m on fire, so come and… put me out.”

“Yeah?”

 

Koichi just nodded, already gripping the other’s hips and urging them forward. Tsuyoshi happily accepted the invitation as he had a thought. He pulled back slightly, trying to find his lover’s sweet spot. He got lucky soon and then, just as he had done with his fingers before, didn’t push against the sensitive spot, but rubbed it with the tip of his cock, trying to apply a good amount of pressure. Koichi arched almost violently at that.

“Oh my god,” he moaned out, “keep doing that, oh god, oh…”

 

That was the first time Koichi came moaning loudly, as his release shook his body. His eyes were tightly shut, both hands fisted in his hair as he kept twitching pleasurably. It took him quite a while to even catch his breath, relaxing into the couch.

“Oh my god,” he moaned out once more. “Tsuyoshi, that was…”

“Sorry,” Tsuyoshi interrupted him, sounding a bit pained. “Can I finish?”

“Oh yeah,” Koichi said, already smiling satedly, “of course.”

 

He didn’t even really notice how Tsuyoshi kept pushing into him until he too finally came. That was something he noticed too, though, as he felt the unfamiliar sensation of being spurted into and made a face.

“Ungh,” he sighed out. “That felt weird.”

“Sorry,” Tsuyoshi panted, resting his body on top of his lover.

 

“Mh,” Koichi made dismissively, the surprise already wearing off as he started to stroke his partner’s hair lovingly. “Tsuyoshi,” he said lazily.

“Hn?” the younger boy grunted, sounding exhausted.

“You are really a fantastic lover.”

 

Tsuyoshi felt his body flush with joy. He finally moved his head up to look at his partner. Koichi smiled at him, eyes sparkling lovingly and Tsuyoshi simply couldn’t resist, nor did he feel any need to and bent down to brush his lover’s lips lightly. Koichi engaged in a light play of lips and tongues, ravelling in the warm daze his body was in. They stayed like that, kissing and caressing each other lazily. It was about 20 minutes later that Koichi complained about his leg going numb and Tsuyoshi retreated from him so they could lie down face to face. A new embrace was soon initiated and Koichi sighed satedly.

 

“That was… unbelievable,” he decided, grinning.

“That good?” Tsuyoshi asked, sounding amused.

Koichi nodded, still feeling too happy to be ashamed.

The younger boy chuckled. “Well, that’s nice to hear. Next time you can try to pleasure me like that.”

“Very happily,” Koichi told him, nuzzling against the other as they set down to sleep.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

“So, you did it without a condom,” Nagase analysed. “Just this once. I don’t think that’ll be too bad.”

Koichi shook his head as he sighed. “That’s not the problem,” he explained. “I mean, we both got tested, just to be a one hundred percent sure, but I’m not really very worried about that.”

“Then what?” Nagase blinked.

Koichi blushed slightly. “I’m telling you this as my best friend. So don’t judge and don’t laugh at me.”

 

“Of course not,” Nagase told him. As Koichi shot him a meaningful look, he grinned sheepishly and added, “Okay, I promise, I’ll try hard.”

“Okay,” Koichi sighed out. “The thing is… I had the orgasm of my life. I’ve never come like that before, be it with Tsuyoshi, or touching myself.”

 

Nagase just stared at him. Trying to keep as even-faced as possible he asked, “And?”

“Well, I’m thinking I’ll always compare now. And I’m striving to have that again. It was… breathtaking. I realise it’s like a once in your life time experience. But isn’t it normal to want it again? But how can I tell Tsuyoshi about it? I don’t want to put that kind of pressure on him. What do I do now?”

 

 _________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Omg, a cliff hanger. o_O  I don’t usually do that – because I hate it. But it’s not a very bad one. And I think it’s kind of funny. Again, something I did not originally intend happened in this story. It was supposed to be all about the no-condom issue, but then I had this flash about Koichi’s new problem. I wonder how he and Tsuyoshi will approach that now. ^_^”

 

Hope you enjoyed!


PS: I'll be off on vacation starting tomorrow, so I won't be around for a week. But I'll take a little notebook with me and write while I'm away, so that I'll be abot to update as soon as I get back. See you guys. ^_^ /