Love Episodes - Episode 8c: Endless Shock

[yoru-no-hikaru.livejournal.com]

Pairing: KinKi Kids
Rating: PG-15
Disclaimer: Don't own KinKi Kids, or anything JE-related
Warnings: swearing, bit dark
Multi-Chapter


Intro: Set in 2002 when Koichi hurt his foot before his SHOCK shows started. What to do when you have sold out shows, but can't walk, let alone dance? Koichi has to face a lot of trouble and also Tsuysohi is affected. How will they pull through this hard time?


Note: This is an answer to a request from maharan1 . Surprisingly it turned out quite different from what I had in mind at first, but I hope you're still gonna like it. (If you've read my stuff so far, you know you'll find awkwardness and embarrassing situations in my fics.) I felt a bit sorry for poor Koichi, but if a thought sticks so hard in my mind, I can't and don't want to ignore it.

Koichi groaned, annoyed. He hated having to get up during the night. He rolled over and away from his lover in order to get up without waking him. He swung his legs out of the bed drowsily and almost crashed onto the floor as his left foot gave out under him completely. Hissing in pain, he tried to straighten up. He blinked shortly, wondering what exactly had happened. After a while of balancing himself on his right foot, he carefully tried to shift his weight again. His left foot pulsed in pain immediately and he almost fell again. Cursing under his breath, Koichi sat back down and turned on the light on his night stand. As his gaze fell upon his left ankle, he almost screamed in shock. It was badly swollen, totally black and there was a bulge on the outer side that definitely should not be there. He shifted to reach across the bed, deciding that now was definitely a moment to wake his partner.

 

"Tsuyoshi?" he asked warily.

The body next to him stirred, but otherwise remained unresponsive. Koichi tried again.

"Tsuyoshi, I think we have a problem," he informed the other.

"What?" Tsuyoshi mumbled irritatedly.

"Well," Koichi said, licking his lips. "I'm not the type to freak easily, but my left foot doesn't support me and it looks like a truck ran over it."

 

That got Tsuyoshi's attention alright. The younger boy almost jumped over Koichi to kneel on the floor in front of him and examine the leg in question. The moment he saw the damage his eyes grew wide.

"B-but," he stuttered, "it looked just fine last night."

"Well, now it doesn't," Koichi stated simply.

"But how did that happen?" Tsuyoshi wondered, shaking his head.

"I don't know," Koichi sighed, "but it seems like I'll need a doctor."

"Can't agree more," Tsuyoshi stated, grabbing his cell from the night stand.

 ____________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

"We're really sorry to trouble you in the middle of the night," Koichi mumbled silently. "But my Musical show starts tonight and I need to be fit for that."

The doctor snorted a bit at that. "I see the urgency of the call, Koichi-kun," the man gave him. "But considering your current state, I'm afraid you'll have to postpone your performance," he informed the boy.

"What do you mean, postpone?" Koichi asked warily.

"You cannot perform like this, Koichi-kun. Your ankle is seriously hurt. We’ll have to put it in plaster for at least three weeks."

 

"Three weeks?!" Koichi gasped out. "No, no. That's impossible. You don't know how tight the schedule of the Imperial Theatre is. Not to mention that I'll lose the agency huge amounts of money for every show I fail to perform. And we have more than 30 shows on 23 days. I have to be on stage," Koichi insisted. "Takizawa-kun recommended you. He said you helped him through some difficulties too. There must be something you can do?"

"Koichi-kun," the doctor sighed. "I'd really love to help you, but I cannot perform miracles. There is no way you can pull a Musical show in this state."

 

Koichi bit his lip, thinking. Then he looked at the doctor again. "What could you do?" he asked seriously. "Talking max. What would be possible?"

"Well," the doctor mumbled reluctantly, apparently not liking the idea of fixing Koichi up. "I could probably stabilise you enough to give you half an hour of full out performance."

"Per show?" Koichi inquired.

The man nodded shortly.

"Well, half an hour isn't exactly much," Koichi mused, "but it'll have to do," he decided. "Please, do your best," he said, bowing his head politely.

"As you wish," the doctor sighed, still reluctant.

 

Koichi was already on his next task, wildly fumbling with his phone, before holding it to his ear.

"Aki," he said evenly as someone on the other end picked up, "gather everybody at the theatre. We need to do some bigger last minute changes." A short pause, then: "Details as I get there. Get going."

With that Koichi hung up. He looked around for Tsuyoshi and found the younger boy's eyes on him, shining fearfully.

"Koichi," Tsuyoshi tried carefully, "do you really think this is a very good idea? I mean, what if you get hurt worse? This happened during rehearsal and you didn't even notice it."

 

"The doctor said it's a common phenomenon that such injuries will only show some time later," Koichi tried to reason.

"Well, that doesn't mean it'd be very wise for you to fling yourself down a bunch of stairs in every show."

"You’re falling down stairs?" the doctor asked, raising his brows.

"It's the key scene of the entire show," Koichi explained evenly, shooting death glares at his lover.

"Don't look at me like that," Tsuyoshi warned him. "You're mad if you want to go through with this."

 

"How does falling down stairs affect my ankle?" Koichi snapped. "If anything, I'd hurt my hip. But I'm good at falling. You know that."

"But you're hurt, Koichi," Tsuyoshi tried to reason again. "That changes everything."

"I need you to trust me to do this," Koichi said intensely. "Please."

"Koichi," Tsuyoshi whined.

"Please, Tsuyoshi," the younger boy insisted. "I need your support in this."

The younger man sighed in defeat. “Very well. If you absolutely have to…”

 

“You know I do,” Koichi told him, smiling encouragingly. “You’d absolutely do the same.”

Tsuyoshi cringed slightly, but still nodded back. “Absolutely.”

“Okay, it’s settled, then,” Koichi nodded back. “Okay, now, please fix me up,” he addressed the doctor.

“It’s a bit tricky,” the man explained. “I doubt you’d be able to do it by yourself.”

“I’ll do it,” Tsuyoshi offered.

 

“Will you be available every time he needs a new bandage?” the doctor asked, eyeing him sceptically.

“Every single time,” Tsuyoshi answered firmly.

“It might take a bit more than you think,” the doctor warned him.

“I won’t leave his side for a second.”

“That might be a bit over-enthusiastic,” Koichi chuckled out.

 

“Well, if you’re sure,” the doctor shrugged, “I’ll show you how to apply the bandage properly. But you might have to re-fix it in the night too.”

“I said,” Tsuyoshi said exasperatedly, “it’s not a problem.”

“So, he can call you any time?”

Koichi chuckled again, catching the other men’s attention. “Sorry,” he laughed out. “But, really, I’m sure he’ll leave his cell phone on the night stand so that I can call him, just in case I can’t roll over to reach him.”

 

Tsuyoshi merely stuck out his tongue at him, while the doctor raised his brows. “You’re living together?”

Koichi blinked. “Huh? Oh, well… not exactly,” he explained, shrugging. “I mean, we both have our own place, but I think we can arrange something for the next few weeks. Ne?”

Tsuyoshi nodded in confirmation.

“Okay, then,” the doctor sighed, getting up to fix Koichi’s foot.

 

About ten minutes later Tsuyoshi had gotten a crash course in foot bandage and Koichi’s ankle was firmly wrapped in fabric.

“Does it feel okay?” the doctor asked.

“Feels alright,” Koichi told him.

“Okay. Remember, it won’t help if it’s not tight, but if your toes go cold or numb, remove the bandages immediately.”

 

Koichi nodded. He blinked in surprise as the doctor got up and left them alone in the room. He shot his lover a quizzical look, but Tsuyoshi only shrugged back at him. A few minutes later the doctor returned, a crutch in his hand.

“Whenever you don’t absolutely have to,” the doctor impressed upon Koichi, “do not use your left foot.”

“Okay,” Koichi nodded firmly, accepting the item, getting up in order to try it out immediately. “Works quite smoothly,” he commented after a few steps.

 

“Ah, don’t get carried away, Koichi-kun,” the doctor warned him. “A few steps aren’t too much of a problem. But always remember, if you take a distance with this, you’ll also have to make your way back. Your arm isn’t used to this kind of usage. So eventually it’ll grow tired.”

“I’ll make sure to be careful,” Koichi said thankfully. “Thank you so much for your help.”

“What little I can do,” the doctor smiled at him. “Make sure to come back for check-up in two days.”

“Thanks a lot,” Koichi repeated. “Shall we go, then?” he asked in Tsuyoshi’s direction.

The younger boy nodded. “Thank you so much for helping,” he said, bowing.

Then he turned to Koichi, supporting him as best he could.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

The shock was huge when the entire assemble saw Koichi’s current state. Even Johnny had been informed and come back from a business trip to Korea.

“Are you sure you can perform?” the boss asked Koichi sceptically.

“Positive,” Koichi nodded with a confidence he didn’t really feel. “The doctor also said that if we change the show a bit, I can do it.”

 

“Do you think you can make the necessary changes in such a short amount of time?”

“It’ll be okay,” Koichi insisted. “It’s what the entire show is about, really. The stage is a moving thing. We’ll just have to adapt appropriately.”

Johnny sighed. “Very well, do your best, then.” “He turned to the group that had gathered around Koichi. “You-tachi, take care of him,” he ordered.

Everybody just nodded.

 

Then Koichi clapped his hands. “Okay, let’s get to work. Tsubasa-kun,” he addressed his co-actor. “We can’t exactly switch roles, but as it is it seems they’re quite reversed. You’ll have to do quite a lot of my dancing parts.”

“Never worry about that, Koichi,” Tsubasa assured him. “I’ll give it my best.”

“I know,” Koichi smiled. “You always do. Okay, everybody in position for the intro.”

Tsuyoshi left the stage and took a seat in a front row of the seating area. He sighed.

 

I really hope this will turn out okay.

 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

“Get more ice,” Tsuyoshi ordered irritatedly, waving his hand wildly.

Two of the staff members dragged Koichi to a seat and let him slip down onto it carefully. He hissed in pain.

“Fuck,” he cursed, rubbing his swollen ankle.

Tsuyoshi was immediately on the ground, examining the foot carefully. He cringed. It seemed to pulse with pain.

 

“About time too,” Tsuyoshi bit at a girl who handed him a small bag with ice in it, grabbing the item harshly and pressing it onto Koichi’s ankle. “Better?” he asked anxiously.

Koichi tried to smile at his lover, but he could feel it turning into a grimace of pain.

“Sorry,” Akiyama told the shocked girl as he pulled her away from the bunch of people who were fussing over Koichi's injury.  “Tsuyoshi is really worried about Koichi. And the fact that he can’t really help is driving him mad. So, please forgive him for being rude.”

The girl nodded oddly, but then retreated quickly, obviously still shocked by the entire situation.

 

“Tell the staff no second encore,” Tsuyoshi ordered.

Koichi, however, shook his head. “No, I’ll go. Just a few minutes.”

“Now, don’t be ridiculous,” Tsuyoshi burst out. “You don’t have to ruin yourself.”

“I’m not gonna,” the other told him, finally an only slightly pained smile on his lips. “I’ll just go out and talk. Please, let me. I enjoy concluding the show with everybody. It’s when I feel closest to all these people who support me when I’m on stage.”

 

Tsuyoshi sighed. “Fine, then. But don’t take forever.”

Koichi nodded.

“I mean it,” Tsuyoshi warned him, “if you start babbling about the wave-particle-duality-paradox, I’ll get on stage to collect you.”

The older boy laughed heartily. “Okay, I won’t forget that.”

“And then let’s get home soon, ne?”

“Thank you, Tsuyoshi,” Koichi said softly.

The younger boy merely nodded encouragingly.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Tsuyoshi looked into the mirror. He felt repulsed by the reflection. Not only was he nowhere as strong as his partner, who worked as hard as he possibly could despite being handicapped, but he felt actually relieved, knowing that Koichi couldn’t appear in the bathroom out of the blue to catch him taking drugs. He hated that he had to hide his problems. He hated himself for hiding from Koichi. But if word got out about his illness KinKi Kids would certainly cease to exist – and that just couldn’t happen. No. He was strong enough to do this. He grabbed the last of three pills from its box and quickly drowned the small items, gulping some water down after them. He sighed. He could do this.

 

 ___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Tsuyoshi sat up straight in his bed, eyes wide open and heart racing like mad.

 

What…?! What happened just now? Something woke me. It’s… No, it’s silent. Earth quake? It’s the season, but…

 

He frowned, then realised that the other side of the bed was empty.

 

Koichi.

 

Tsuyoshi got up, alarmed.

“Koichi,” he called out anxiously, but no answer came. “Koichi,” he tried again, turning on the lights.

He left the bedroom, but found the hallway dark. There was some light glowing at the end, though. Tsuyoshi blinked as he trotted in the direction of the bathroom.

“Koichi,” he called out softly as he looked through the door into the lit room.

“Don’t,” Koichi’s voice burst through the room harshly.

 

Tsuyoshi flinched. “Eh?”

“Don’t come in,” Koichi demanded, sounding harsh, but his voice was uneven, as though he was holding back tears.

Tsuyoshi halted for a moment, licking his lips as he pondered his options. Koichi was worked up, maybe he could calm him a bit.

“What’s wrong?” the younger boy asked timidly.

Silence. Just when Tsuyoshi thought he wouldn’t get a response at all, he heard a voice mumbling again.

 

“I… nothing much. Just… taking a while,” Koichi stuttered. “You go back to bed. I’ll be out in a minute.”

Tsuyoshi sighed. “Koichi, let me help you. Please.”

“Fuck off already,” Koichi shot at hit. “I don’t need help.”

Deciding that he couldn’t ease his lover enough to get anywhere any time soon, he simply opened the door fully and stepped in. His eyes shot open as he found his lover on the floor.

“I said stay out,” Koichi yelled at him, voice hoarse.

 

The older boy glared at him, but the effect was hardly big with his eyes red and his cheeks tear-stricken.

Tsuyoshi moved forward to help the other up, but Koichi threw his crutch at him.

“What the fuck?!” Tsuyoshi burst out.

“Get out,” Koichi demanded.

“Stop being ridiculous,” the younger boy sighed as he moved closer to his lover.

He was just about to grab the other’s arm when he almost slipped. Blinking is surprise, he froze for a second when he saw that the floor was wet. He heard Koichi sob and bit his lip.

 

“I’m sorry,” Koichi croaked out. “Sorry, I… my leg cramped and I just… couldn’t get up. I tried, really…”

“Later,” Tsuyoshi decided firmly as he finally grabbed his lover firmly and pulled him into a somewhat upright position.

 

Koichi still could not stand on his own. Tsuyoshi thought that his leg might have gone numb from his awkward position on the floor. Koichi must have tried to get up repeatedly. He mused that most probably he had just heard his lover fall down again and that had woken him up. But there was still time for speculation later. Supporting his partner effectively he pulled him up fully and dragged him away from the wet puddle on the floor, moving towards the bathtub to seat him properly and to clean him up.

“No, no,” Koichi protested again, “I’m dirty.”

 

“If you keep fighting like this we’ll both fall down again,” Tsuyoshi shot at him, sounding harsher than he had intended, but it had the desired effect of silencing Koichi’s protests, verbal and physical. “Stop being a child, already,” he added, still irritated, but a bit gentler.

As Koichi finally gave in completely it wasn’t all that difficult to heave him into the tub. Once that was done Tsuyoshi immediately turned on the hot water, letting it run over the other’s body.

“Ano…” Tsuyoshi tried warily, “do you hurt anywhere? I mean, specifically?”

Koichi shook his head, looking miserable.

 

“Okay,” Tsuyoshi sighed out, a little bit relieved. “Here,” he said, handing his lover a bottle of shower gel. “Just this once it should be fine in here. I’ll be right back.”

With that he left the room, only to return a few minutes later with a cloth and a bottle of bath cleaner. Koichi blushed furiously in embarrassment, but, deciding that new apologies might only agitate his lover again, he remained silent, cleaning himself thoroughly.

Once they were back in bed, Koichi couldn’t go back to sleep. He kept shifting and turning nervously.

 

After a while Tsuyoshi sighed. “Koichi,” he addressed his lover, turning around to face him and preventing the other from turning away. “I… I’m sorry,” he stated simply and at that Koichi blinked at him. Tsuyoshi laughed affectionately, stroking his hair softly. “Look, I know it must have been so… embarrassing that I… well, found you.”

“Can we not talk about it, please?” Koichi asked, feeling edgy.

“No, we should talk about it,” Tsuyoshi insisted. “I understand it’s difficult, but I don’t want this kind of awkwardness between us.”

 

“But it is… it’s too much,” Koichi protested, shaking his head. “You even cleaned it. I… How can you even look at me now? Don’t you think I’m gross?”

“Gross?” Tsuyoshi laughed out nervously. “Hardly. You didn’t do anything. It’s nothing you could have helped. I mean, when you get up to go to the toilet, certainly you can’t keep it in forever. And after falling down... It’s not your fault,” he assured the other.

“But it’s still gross,” Koichi insisted, yet snuggled up against Tsuyoshi when the latter embraced him softly.

 

“It’s nothing I won’t survive,” Tsuyoshi told him. “I mean, I take it into my mouth, after all, and even swallow what comes out.”

“That’s totally different,” Koichi told him.

“Well, of course it is,” Tsuyoshi admitted. “I just want to say that it’s basically not… gross.”

Koichi pulled back a bit to look sceptically at him.

The younger boy sighed. “Okay, maybe it is a bit.”

Koichi groaned, but Tsuyoshi quickly pulled him close again.

 

“But it’s okay,” Tsuyoshi assured him. “When you’re so close to someone things like that just happen. Remember how you held my hair back when I was so sick after eating that Kimchi?”

Koichi smiled vaguely and nodded.

“See? And did you think I’m gross?”

“Yeah.”

“Thanks.”

“But it really is.”

“That’s not the point.”

“Then, what is?”

“That you got over it,” Tsuyoshi explained, smiling gently. “Those are just little things. They won’t affect me a lot.”

 

Koichi considered his lover for a while, then smiled back. “Okay. Thanks.”

He moved forward slightly, but then hesitated and stopped mid-movement. Tsuyoshi chuckled lightly at that, pulled him close insistently and kissed his partner lovingly. Koichi sighed happily, answering the sweet kiss.

 

“I love you,” Tsuyoshi told him, gently caressing the small of his back.

“I love you too,” Koichi returned, pecking the other’s lips shyly.

Tsuyoshi nodded at him reassuringly, but then shifted again.

“Okay,” the younger boy sighed, “now let’s try and sleep some, ne?”

“Right,” Koichi agreed, finally feeling somewhat relaxed again. He kept his body against Tsuyoshi and finally drifted back off to sleep.

 

 ___________________________________________________________________________________________________

“Otsukare-sama desu,” the umpteenth staff member addressed Koichi politely.

“Thank goodness it’s over,” Tsuyoshi sighed, sounding exhausted.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Koichi mused. “The last few days were actually good fun.”

“Yeah, it’s good that you can walk without the crutch again,” Tsuyoshi agreed. “But still, these past few weeks certainly cost me several years of my life.”

“I’m sorry,” Koichi said sincerely. “I had you so worried.”

 

“Mh,” Tsuyoshi made, shaking his head dismissively. “You really know very well what you can ask of your body. You did great. I’m so proud of you,” he declared happily. “But I’m still glad it’s over.”

“Okay,” Koichi nodded. “Just let me get changed, then we have dinner with everyone, okay?”

“Sounds nice,” Tsuyoshi smiled. “I’ll wait here. And next year I’ll take a role in the play so I can look after you.”

Koichi laughed at that. “Absolutely not.”

 

“Why not?” Tsuyoshi asked a little bit unnerved.

“Because I’ll need you backstage to coordinate,” Koichi told him.

“Eh?” Tsuyoshi blinked.

“If you will take the job, that is,” the older boy offered, smiling.

“I’ll too take it,” the other grinned at him.

 

“Cool,” Koichi grinned back. “Then I’ll be your boss.”

Tsuyoshi snorted at that. “And you’d employ me to do dirty jobs for you,” he mused playfully.

“Hm,” Koichi mimicked his musing tone, “rather I’d have you suck me clean…”

“Ah,” the younger boy nodded, embracing his lover lightly.

“Nh, don’t,” Koichi said, struggling lightly. “I’m sweaty and sticky and I smell.”

“Don’t care,” Tsuyoshi informed him happily as he captured his lips.

 

Koichi chuckled a bit, but soon enough let himself be eased into a slow, but deep kiss.

“Oi,” Akiyama called out at the pair. “You can do that later. Koichi, a Potato reporter is waiting for you.”

Sadly he got no response, the two boys seemingly unwilling to separate, or even take in their surroundings fully just yet.

 

“Hey,” Akiyama tried again. “Look, I know you guys are relieved now and stuff, but we’re not really all the way done yet.”

No reaction.

“Koichi. … Na, Koichi. … I mean it… Oh, come on guys…”

Koichi chuckled again, whispering, “Shall we give in?”

“Not just yet,” Tsuyoshi whispered back in an amused voice. “Aki is good fun to tease.”

“And he’s so cute when he’s all pouty,” Koichi added playfully.

“Guys,” Akiyama whined desperately. “Come on, Shin-chan is gonna be mad at me…”

_________________________________________________________________________________________________


Yosh. Tadaim-aaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!   \^o^/
Yays, I'm back! I had a few nice days in Vienna, but now I'm back and ever since I returned I've worked on my updates non-stop. Next will be a much happier chapter. ^_~  And then finally the "You" story line is coming up. I'm feeling very excited about that. Well, for now, that's all. Jaa! ^_^

Comments

[ritchuuki.livejournal.com]

I really love this one, I re-reading it all over :D

thank for writing~
<3

[yoru-no-hikaru.livejournal.com]

Thanks a lot for commenting! <3 I like this one too. It shows a close kind of bond that makes me feel fuzzy and warm. ^^

[ritchuuki.livejournal.com]

I like this kind of story :D

No, you deserved more comment. Hehe, this was good. Really!