Survivors - Chapter 4: How to... Make new friends

[yoru-no-hikaru.livejournal.com]

Main Characters: KinKi Kids (AU characters)
Pairing: KinKi Kids (later), for now: TsuTsu, Koichi/Machida
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Don't own KinKi Kids, or anything JE-related
Warnings: Swearing, violence, mentions of rape
Setting: AU
Multi-Chapter


Intro: Koichi is suffering from physical damage. Even so, he gets wrapped in new dramatic happenings. A new character turns up unexpectedly and stirs emotions up. Tsuyoshi is affected by that as well and is confronted with his own pain again. Also: Some really cute Macchin fanboying and Takahashi finding a lover.


Notes: So sorry for the late update. RL is so busy right now. Finding a job is difficult. But now I finally finished this. So, please go and read. ^^

“Mou,” Koichi complained weakly, as he rolled over onto his right side again.

“I still don’t understand why you tried to slide down the entire staircase railing in the research centre,” Uchi sighed, shaking his head.

“I told you, it was a bet,” Koichi mumbled half-heartedly.

“How old are you, really?” Uchi scolded him. “You should act as a role model, you know.”

“Yes, yes,” Koichi waved him off, “now give me my doughnut, or else I can’t sit.”

Uchi handed him a small cushion that he had designed especially for their group leader to sit on.

“At least your face is already getting better,” he commented as he took a closer look at Koichi after the latter had sat up properly.

“That wasn’t such a big deal in the first place,” the older man grunted.

“Acting tough again?” Uchi commented.

“You said it yourself, it heals quickly,” Koichi shrugged. “The blow wasn’t all that hard. Neither was it aimed very well.”

“But it had you on the floor,” Uchi reminded me.

“Macchin totally exaggerated, really,” Koichi muttered, rubbing the back of his head. He winced slightly when he shifted on his cushion. Then he blinked. “Speaking of him… where is Macchin anyway?”

“Looking for your Machi-pon?” Uchi teased.

“Stop calling him that, already,” Koichi shot at him. “It’s degrading.”

The younger boy just grinned at him, but didn’t push any further.

“I think he went to see his friend,” Uchi informed Koichi. “You know, the one he always hangs out with whenever for some reason he cannot stalk you.”

“Ah, the guy with the spiky hair,” Koichi mumbled, thinking. “What’s his name again? Yamato… Yamura… Yara-kun.”

“Him exactly,” Uchi confirmed.

“Hm,” Koichi mused. “I just hope he won’t run into Tsuyoshi.”

“Why are you saying that?” Uchi wanted to know.

“He all but gave him a back punch right there on the street. Had he not thought it more urgent to treat me… I wonder what he’ll do.”

“You shouldn’t worry all that much, Koichi-kun,” Uchi said with a sympathetic smile. “Machida-kun might be a bit impulsive, but I think he’s a reasonable guy. Plus, he actually likes Tsuyoshi-san. I think they’re gonna be okay.”

“Let’s hope for the best,” Koichi sighed out as he grabbed for a bottle of water. “It’s bad enough Tsuyoshi and I don’t get along.”

“Then why don’t you?” the younger man suggested.

“It should really be that simple,” Koichi sighed, taking a few gulps out of his bottle.

“Sometimes it is just that simple,” Uchi retorted. “Speaking of which,” he continued, a grin coming to his face, “didn’t you have a fight with Machida-kun too? Seems like you guys made up. So, how is it now?”

Koichi considered him for a moment, closing his water bottle again. “What do you mean?” he finally asked.

“Oh, come on,” Uchi sighed, rolling his eyes, “everybody knows he totally has the hots for you. And it’s clear that you must have agreed on something. So, are you now… lovers?”

Another silence followed, as Koichi debated with himself as to what to do. Uchi waited patiently, not pushing in any way. Finally Koichi flopped down onto his side again, supporting his head on his left hand.

“Yes,” he stated casually.

“Uhm,” Uchi nodded, and with that the topic was over.

____________________________________________________________________________________________

“I’m telling you, his hair feels like silk and he smells like strawberries,” Machida told his friend excitedly.

“Oh, come on,” Yara retorted. “No proper man smells like strawberries.”

“This one does,” Machida insisted. “I mean, I never would have thought he’d touch me in the first place…” His eyes started to gleam. “And then his hands were so soft and his skin so warm and the way he held me close, I…”

Yara shifted a bit. “Okay, I get it. Don’t get me wrong, but I don’t need all the details.”

“He’s just perfect,” Machida smiled brightly.

“I’m happy for you,” Yara smiled back.

“He was sleeping when I left today,” Machida kept relating. “And he has this cute little…”

He broke off as he noticed someone had come into the room they were sitting in. As he looked up, his eyes darkened.

“Machida-kun,” Tsuyoshi said, scratching his arm and averting his eyes, “I… do you have a minute?”

Machida hesitated. What would the other want from him?

But then Yara helped with the decision. “It’s fine,” he told Tsuyoshi. “I’ll take a short leave to get some fresh water. You guys talk.”

And before Machida could even voice, Yara had jumped up and practically fled the room. A long awkward silence followed. Machida kept shifting about on the floor while Tsuyoshi kept fidgeting with his fingers.

“How is Koichi-san?” Tsuyoshi asked suddenly and both the voice and the content of the question surprised Machida so much, it took him a while to answer.

“Well,” the younger man finally responded, “he’s… okay, I guess.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Tsuyoshi sighed in relief.

He made a motion as though he made to seat himself, but then seemed to change his mind and remain standing after all.

“Machida-kun,” he continued, “listen, I wanted to say that I am sorry about what happened.”

Machida merely scoffed at that.

“I realise, of course, that I have to apologise to Koichi-san in person,” the older man continued, “and I plan to do that. I just don’t want to barge into his private space with things as they are between us. I just wanted to ask you to please tell him my best regards and that I wish him well.”

Machida looked at him for quite a while, biting his lip.

“Why did you do that?” he finally asked, sounding sad rather than angry.

“I… don’t know,” Tsuyoshi told him helplessly. “I don’t know what… hit me. At any rate it was stupid and childish and… I was totally… out of it. When I realised what I had done I thought I didn’t even know myself anymore.”

Considering him for another moment Machida smiled at Tsuyoshi again.

“You know, it’s a bit sad that you cannot be this honest with Koichi,” he told the older. “I know you’re a good guy, kind-hearted and caring… I just wish you and Koichi could each see the wonderful points of the other person.”

“He really hates me, doesn’t he?” Tsuyoshi grinned weakly.

Machida thought on that, but then shook his head. “I don’t think he does. He thinks you’re a bit full of yourself and other than that completely irrational. Oh, and he thinks you cannot accept another person’s opinion beside your own. But really, he feels irritated a lot, but I think most of all, he really just wants to now what the fuck is going on in that head of yours. He’s like that,” Machida grinned with a shrug.

“He thinks I’m narrow-minded?” Tsuyoshi asked, sounding bothered.

“You threatened to kill him more than just once,” Machida reminded him, “I think you got off pretty well.”

The older man smiled at that. “Yeah, I guess.”

A more comfortable silence followed. Machida was indeed happy he had been able to talk to Tsuyoshi. He liked the other man a lot and it had bothered him a lot to be on such bad terms. Then there was also the fact that Yara and he were close and it would have been difficult to hang out with that sort of tension around.

“Does he fuck you?” Tsuyoshi suddenly asked.

A second’s hesitation, then, “Not just yet. But… why are you interested?”

“I was just wondering,” Tsuyoshi shrugged. “You seem to be very interested in him, but I didn’t think he was the type for that. Least of all since he has a girl, who will be with him.”

“Are you worried?” Macchin asked sceptically.

“No,” Tsuyoshi stated plainly. “Just curious.”

Machida wanted to ask yet another question, however, that was when Yara came back into the room. He nodded respectfully at Tsuyoshi.

“I filled up the store,” he informed his group leader.

“Thank you,” Tsuyoshi answered, nodding back.

“Are you guys done?” Yara wanted to know.

“Oh… yeah,” Tsuyoshi decided and made to leave. Just before he swept out, he turned to Machida once more. “So, please give Koichi-san my regards.”

“I will,” Machida nodded with a smile. “Thanks.”

With that Tsuyoshi was out the door.

“Everything alright?” Yara asked.

“Yup,” Machida stated with a grin. “Everything just fine. I’m just wondering whether I should bring Koichi some meat. He’s still recovering…”

“You shouldn’t go out,” Yara told him, sounding sceptical.

“Well, do you expect Koichi to stay the only one who will go out there? We’ll have to find more volunteers eventually.”

“So long as he has you as a cheerleader, I think he’ll be fine,” Yara teased.

Machida, however, turned stern. “I don’t mean to make fun of him in any way. Or just stand by and watch as he stands up and fights. I want to stand by his side. No matter what that virus did to him, it’s still a violation of his body and people seem to forget that very easily. It’s nothing he’s asked for, neither something he can help and least of all it’s something to make anything easier for him. If anything, I think he’ll need more support than everybody else.”

“Woah, Macchin,” Yara said, staring at the other. “You’re so cool.”

“Aiming after the coolest guy in the camp,” Machida shrugged. “You have no idea, really. There’s this guy, Takahashi, who is in Nakai-kun’s group. I don’t know why, but for some reason he’s always hanging out at our shelter and Koichi really treats him like one of our own.”

“Boy, you’re so in love,” Yara teased with a grin.

Macchin simply stuck out his tongue to the other before resuming his talk. “And the other day there was that…”

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Koichi sighed a bit in relief as he found that moving didn’t hurt as much anymore as it used to. Getting up with almost no trouble, he made his way out and to the shower stalls, when he ran into an intruder.

“Ojama shimasu,” the man said politely, bowing down.

“Mah, it’s okay,” Koichi assured him. “How can I help you, Nakai-kun?”

“Sorry,” Nakai said apologetically, rubbing the back of his head, “I’m looking for one of my boys. He hangs out here a lot lately, so I thought…”

“Oh, right,” Koichi interrupted him, nodding frantically. “Takeuchi…”

“Takahashi,” Nakai corrected him.

“Yeah,” Koichi nodded, thinking. “Sorry, haven’t seen him all day.”

“Strange…” Nakai mused. “He left this morning and hasn’t returned yet.”

“He’s probably out, having some fun,” Koichi shrugged.

Then he blinked. Taking a closer look around, he frowned slightly.

“Uchi-kun…” he mumbled silently.

“Sorry, what?” Nakai asked.

“Uchi-kun,” Koichi repeated more clearly. “Seems that he’s out too.”

“And you’re telling me that because…?”

“Well, I can’t be sure,” the younger man shrugged, “but I had a feeling they had a thing for each other.”

Nakai stared at him. “And what… you think they are… together?”

“Probably,” Koichi shrugged.

“What do you mean, probably?” Nakai demanded. “Come on, we’ve got to go and find them.”

“Eh? Why?”

“They are just boys,” Nakai told him insistently. “Who know what they might be doing.”

“Well, why don’t you just let them? Isn’t it good if they find something pleasant together?”

“No, no, no, no,” Nakai demanded, and shaking his head madly, he turned around and left.

Koichi blinked after him, biting his lip. He pondered whether he should follow the other, if only to protect poor Uchi-kun in case Nakai decided to take his head off should he find it in a to him inappropriate place. Following his more urgent instinct, he followed the other man outside. Several places had established as lovers meeting points. For the younger generation the empty store rooms in the western part of the camp had become a popular meeting point. As Koichi caught up with Nakai he thought if he should try to talk to him again, but the older man seemed so determined, he thought it wiser to stay quiet and just stick around in case he was needed. As they got nearer to the store rooms, Koichi suddenly felt a hand grabbing his own and jumped, pulling it back.

“What?!” he asked, confused.

Nakai stopped, looking at him. “Oh, just let me… it’ll look less suspicious,” he explained, grabbing for Koichi’s hand again.

“But I don’t want people to think we go here for that,” Koichi demanded, keeping his hand way out of reach.

“Fine,” Nakai sighed, resuming his fast-paced walk.

Once more Koichi had trouble keeping up with him. Then he stopped, eyes widening in shock when the other simply ripped the first door open without a warning. Inside there were two guys Koichi had seen before, but didn’t really know. They lived way in the west and even though the camp wasn’t exactly huge, he didn’t see much of people who lived at the other end. The two boys were sprawled out on the floor together, one of them bare-chested, both having their pants open.

“If you keep lying there, your back’s gonna hurt later,” Nakai stated simply, then shut the door again.

“Nakai-kun,” Koichi addressed him again, urgently this time. “You cannot simply…”

“Well, if I ask them `Are you in there?´ I don’t think that’ll help,” Nakai told him dismissively, opening the next door.

As light fell into the dark room, Koichi’s eyes widened at the sight that hit him. Nakai kept standing there paralysed as well. There was a girl lying on the floor, shaking and whimpering. From the distance and with so little light, it was a bit difficult to make out, but Koichi thought he saw blood on her legs.

“Oh my god,” he breathed, feeling a tight knot building in his stomach.

Then there was a sound and both Koichi’s and Nakai’s heads flew into the according direction. There was someone else in there, hiding in the shadows. Koichi gulped biting his lip.

“Come on out,” he heard Nakai calling out.

And much to his surprise the figure in the shadows moved, coming closer. Once he was hit by actual day light, they could make out a rather tall, handsome guy with shoulder length hair. His face was calm, even though his lips kept twitching slightly, but he was slumping rather than walking and he looked a bit shaken. In contrast to that, the boy took out a pack of cigarettes and lit one of them, puffing into the air.

“What… happened here?” Nakai asked.

“Sex,” the guy stated simply. “But I’m done, so the room’s free now.”

Koichi frowned deeply, taking another look at the girl on the ground. Then he grabbed the guy by the arm and shook him fiercely.

“What the fuck are you talking about?!” he yelled. “Sex?! I don’t even need you to tell me what happened here?”

“Will you let me go, then?” the boy asked, looking at him evenly.

“Wha-” Koichi stared at the guy in disbelief.

He shook his head wildly, finally letting go of the other and heading right for the girl.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

The girl writhed on the floor, moaning. Koichi tried to get her to focus, but her eyes kept travelling randomly. She kept mumbling silently, but none of her words made sense. As he took her face into his hands, he frowned. Placing a hand on her forehead, he sighed, shaking his head.

“Quite some temperature,” he analysed. “I’ll take her back to our shelter.”

“You still don’t have your meds guy,” Nakai reminded him, eyeing the stranger intensely.

“Nakai-kun?” A voice rang from a distance.

As Nakai turned his head, he sighed in relief. “Where have you been?” he demanded, grabbing they boy as soon as he was within reach.

“I told you I’d go out to visit a friend,” Takahashi defended himself.

“But then you weren’t there,” Nakai accused.

“Well, we… wanted some privacy,” Takahashi shrugged.

“We’ll talk about that later,” Nakai decided. “Where’s Uchi-kun?”

“Hiding,” Takahashi told him. “He thinks you’ll hit him.”

“Later maybe,” the older man said exasperatedly. “But right now he’s needed here.”

“What happened?” the boy asked again, taking a glance into the still open room. His eyes widened immediately. “Shit.”

“You can say that again. Now, go, get Uchi.”

“H-hai,” Takahashi nodded, turning on his heel and running.

“And you,” Nakai said looking at the guy they had found with the girl, “shouldn’t you be running, or something?”

“Where to?” the stranger asked with a shrug. “She’s from my shelter. It’s not like I can go back there now.”

Nakai considered him for another moment. Shaking his head sadly, he sighed.

“Fine, you come with me, then?”

“WHAT?!?!?!”

Koichi and the guy had burst out at the same time.

“You’re taking that little shit in?!” Koichi demanded. “Look what he’s done here.”

“I saw that, Koichi-kun,” Nakai told him.

“And yet?!”

“Well, what do you want to do?” Nakai asked. “If his people find him here, he’ll most probably be killed. If not, they’ll kick him out and he’ll be living on the street.”

“Would serve him right,” Koichi spat. “To treat a girl like this.”

“And how, Koichi, do you think that would improve the situation?” Nakai asked him evenly. “Do you think it’ll be better to have him strolling the streets?”

Koichi bit his lip. He looked at the guy in question once more, but found him completely unresponsive.

“He’s just a stupid piece of shit,” he bit.

“I don’t even want to come,” the guy said sternly.

“You should,” Nakai told him plainly.

That was when Takahashi returned with Uchi.

“Koichi-kun,” Uchi called out.

“Ah, here,” Koichi told him, making way for the younger man.

Uchi moved over instantly, taking a closer look at the girl. He frowned.

“Dehydrated,” he analysed. “Fever. Glazed eyes. And from what I can see… the insides of her thighs are black…”

“I know,” Koichi said miserably. “That’s because that guy,” he said aggressively, pointing at the guy in question…

But Nakai cut into his outburst. “That is immaterial now,” Nakai shot at him. “Uchi-kun, take her back to the shelter, please.”

“Right,” Uchi nodded, gathering the girl up in his arms and leaving the scene.

Koichi got up from the floor as well. He looked at Nakai and it seemed they communicated without words, even though their communication was seemingly an argument.

“Come on,” Nakai finally said to the guy they had found there.

Not fighting any further they guy followed Nakai and the two of them left the scene as well.

“What ever happened here?” Takahashi asked, shaking his head. “And who is that guy?”

“I don’t know,” Koichi answered with a sigh. “I totally don’t get what Nakai’s doing here either.”

“Maybe they know each other?” Takahashi suggested.

Koichi just shook his head, sighing in defeat.

“For now we’re done. You should go home, Takahashi-kun.”

Takahashi blinked as he watched Koichi turning around and leaving the scene.

____________________________________________________________________________________________

“Rape?” Tsuyoshi gasped.

“At the store rooms,” Yonehana confirmed.

“Who did it?” the older man asked.

“Apparently it was a guy called Akanishi Jin. He lived in a shelter way out in the west. But he couldn’t go back there after what happened, so Nakai-kun took him in.”

“Isn’t Nakai’s shelter full?” Tsuyoshi asked.

The other merely shrugged. Then he sighed.

“Forcing someone,” he mumbled, shaking his head. “What will make you do something like that?”

“Who knows?” Tsuyoshi muttered. “I guess there can be many reasons…”

“But really, I would never…”

“It’s easy for you to say that,” Tsuyoshi told him. “You get it, after all.”

“I wouldn’t have forced you,” Yonehana insisted.

“That’s good to know,” the older man grinned weakly. “Still, we don’t know that guy’s story.”

“But what if he does it again?” Yonehana suggested.

“Want me to shoot him?” Tsuyoshi sneered. “Because that’s about the only option we have to be entirely sure.”

Yonehana gulped at that.

“It’s terrible,” Tsuyoshi agreed, “but things like that are bound to happen in a situation like this. The poor boy is probably shaken too.”

“What – now you’re defending him too?” Yonehana gasped.

“No, no,” Tsuyoshi shook his head. “What he did was bad. I mean, really bad. He couldn’t find a good excuse for it. It’s just that… in situations of severe desperation, sometimes you’ll do things you don’t even associate with yourself. You can’t even explain it and next time you look at yourself, it’s too late. There is no undoing it now.”

“But if everybody did that,” Yonehana tried to reason.

“I know what you’re saying, Yo,” Tsuyoshi said with a sympathetic smile. “But again, our only way of punishing him effectively would be to shoot him. And… I’m not saying that it can compare easily, but have you never done something really stupid? Something you regretted severely, but couldn’t change?”

“But that…” Yonehana shook his head.

“I said it would hardly compare, but again, dreadful as it is, it’s done now. Do you really want this guy to suffer at this forever?”

“It would serve him right,” Yonehana insisted.

Tsuyoshi sighed. Then he grinned weakly. “Well, in order to improve my own character, I will accept that we apparently disagree about this.”

“Huh?” the younger man blinked.

Tsuyoshi chuckled at that. “Forget it. Well, as it is, we can only watch Nakai and see what we can do. Just consider this, when next you meet this guy: His life in here is gonna be a living hell. And please at least ask yourself, if you want to be part of that.”

“Fine,” Yonehana mumbled.

Tsuyoshi kept standing there, staring at the wall, as he addressed the other once more. “What do you think, honestly? If you have made a grave mistake… should you suffer at it forever?”

Yonehana looked at him, feeling confused. He felt something tightening in his guts, as though his answer would be of severe importance, but in the end he dared not make a coice after all.

“I don’t know…”

___________________________________________________________________________________________





“Akanishi-kun,” Nakai tried for the umpteenth time, “don’t you want to eat?”

The other remained silent and just kept staring at his plate.

“And will you ever speak to me again? The only thing I could extract from you ever since we got here was your name.”

“Why do you even bother?” Jin finally spoke, his voice sounding icy. “No matter you took me in, you think just as everybody else… that I’m a despicable piece of shit.”

“Why would I think that?” Nakai asked him calmly.

“Why?” Jin gaped out. “Because I…” he hesitated for a second, then gulped, starting over. “Because I forced myself on her.”

“You know very well what you did,” Nakai nodded at him.

“Everybody does,” Jin spit out. “Everybody hates me now.”

“Will you believe me if I tell you that I am sorry that it’s you?” the older man said sympathetically.

“What ever are you talking about?” Jin demanded.

“I expected something like this would happen. Probably will happen again,” Nakai analysed. “You, now, happen to be in the very shitty position of being the first who snapped and thus far also being the only one it happened to. Tempers will go down again and change with time. But until that time, you’ll have a lot of trouble.”

“I really don’t get you,” Jin said shaking his head. “I won’t be forgiven,” he stated firmly.

Nakai just kept looking at him. Jin gulped, biting his lip.

“I can’t be forgiven,” he went on, voice rising. “It’s unforgivable. I did not break into a store to steal a few apples. What I did was despicable. How could anyone ever forgive me?”

By the end of his outbursts his eyes were stinging with tears and his breathing was laboured.

“Believe it, or not,” Nakai told the younger man, “but you will find it hardest to forgive yourself.”

“Impossible,” Jin muttered, shaking his head and wiping his eyes.

“We’ll see about that,” Nakai told him. “Your own feelings might change as well. But for now, I want you to stay in here. If you wish to go out, consult me first, I don’t want you to stroll about on your own.”

“Worried that someone might get hurt?” Jin asked sarcastically.

“Yes,” Nakai confirmed. “I’m worried that you might get hurt.”

________________________________________________________________________________________

Done. ^^ Hope you guys liked it. Finally a glimpse at Tsuyoshi's more emotional side. There will be more of that. To the KAT-TUN fans, who are reading this: Please don't hate me for using Jin. My two main reasons were: 1) I don't have a KAT-TUN character in here so far and 2) Jin is always easiest for me to write. ^^" I wanted to write something like this to express the desperation in which some of the characters are/will be. I will make his character cool, I promise. Plus, he is really in torment already, I hope I could express that. I didn't really mean for it to turn out so dark in the first place. But now, happier chapters will be coming up. Well, at least one. ^^"

Chapter 3

*coming soon*

Comments

[ritchuuki.livejournal.com]

so you won't continue this story? I find it quite interesting actually
I hope you reconsider to continue it.

thank you for writing it, I like macchin and kochan scenes :-)

[yoru-no-hikaru.livejournal.com]

Oh dear, I haven't read through any of this in ages. ^^" It's actually a neat idea, but ultimately I never really finished the thought. Lately I haven't been writing anyhting much. Sorry for being useless. ^^" I am working on a original work right now and working full time there's hardly any time left for further writing activities. I'm really glad you like this, though. Maybe I'll find the muse and time to finish this. :D

[ritchuuki.livejournal.com]

please :D

But don't make it as burden. We have RL too I know... Just Ganbatte for your daily work ^^